Pray Before Engaging

A moment of conflict can be a great opportunity for us to experience the presence of God and see His grace amplified and alive. Matthew 18:19–20, in context, refers to dealing with discipline in the church. When Jesus said, “Where two or three gather,” He was implying large audiences and large crowds were unnecessary to experience His presence. When you attempt to navigate conflict with your own understanding, it is impossible to please God and find a viable end to the issue. When you pray together before addressing conflict, you submit your own desires and will to God’s purpose and plan for your marriage. You also align your heart and mind to be sensitive to the leading of the Holy Spirit.

Ask God for His direction, wisdom, and leading through conflict. It doesn’t matter what the conflict is about, you should always proceed with prudence and love, extending grace to your spouse. The power of God is present and available for your marriage today. The Holy Spirit dwells within you as a believer in Christ, and you have been given the tools you need to navigate difficult times. Address conflict with precision, stay on topic, honor God, and love your spouse through it all. When you choose to take these steps before conflict arises, you are demonstrating obedience and faith in Christ and His Living Word. You can be sure He will honor that!

Quick Tip

You don’t have to understand every piece of the issue you and your spouse are in conflict over. It is necessary, however, to proceed with prayer and grace. When you are reluctant to pray about an issue, it’s probably an indicator that you really need to pray about that issue. The most important element of having a bulletproof marriage is the ability to successfully and lovingly navigate conflict together. Today, discuss one way you can prepare for potential future conflict.


What is the cost of peace? It is the willingness of brave men and women like yourself to face the most dangerous threats to our way of life. The cost of peace is someone willing to confront the issue and eliminate the threat. No one respects someone who loses their temper—especially if that person is a leader. Don’t be the one who loses their temper in the midst of conflict. Navigating conflict in marriage requires precise communication techniques. Control the emotional side of your tone and address the issue with love. Write down one thing you can do to prepare for conflict in marriage and pray with your spouse about it.


If you have resentment in your heart toward your spouse, you will be reluctant to pray with them about anything, much less an issue causing conflict in your marriage. Open your hands and your heart and let God deal with it. Don’t minimize His role in your life by attempting to deal with the pain yourself. Preparing for conflict in marriage requires a willingness to work through any and every problem together. Today, pray with your spouse—even if you are mad at them. What is one way you can overcome divisiveness to achieve peace in your marriage?

‘ “Again I say to you, that if two of you agree on earth about anything that they may ask, it shall be done for them by My Father who is in heaven. For where two or three have gathered together in My name, I am there in their midst.” ‘ Matthew 18:19-20

Heavenly Father, thank you for your Word and for the instructions you give us. We ask for you to help us navigate conflict in our marriage in a way that honors you and reflects your love to each other. Amen.


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